Thoughts and Musings

Let Sleeping Baers Lie

Imagine being me for a few minutes. Enjoy. 

You’re sound asleep and everything is right with the world. Then you hear a squawk from next to you, but you’re still asleep and it barely penetrates your dream. After a few moments another squawk penetrates the stillness of your bedroom. This time is rouses you enough to know something is happening, but you’re eyes won’t open and you just lay there on the edge of sleep, not even aware you should be aware of something going on. Another squawk finally awakens you to the fact that your baby in his cradle next to your bed is squawking for food. Do you get him? Are you awake enough to feed him? 

Of course the next squawk sounds much angrier. So you rollover, listening to the snaps and pops of your joints protesting the movement. They don’t matter, what matters is getting the baby and feeding him. You’re an expert at this; this is baby number three for you, so nursing him on your bed isn’t a new position for you. You pull him into you, snuggling him face to boob and shove that nipple into his mouth. Of course, now you’re awake, so you watch him in the minimal light of the morning sun bleeding through the blankets you have up instead of curtains because blankets insulate better than any damn curtain you’ve ever bought. 

Your son, Thing Number Three, latches on with gusto and greedily nurses while you both lay there, but you realize something when you’re looking at him. He woke you up from a dead sleep to get you to feed him, but he didn’t bother waking himself up at all. He’s still asleep. Nursing certainly, but asleep nonetheless. Briefly you wonder if he’s dreaming about nursing and you’re creating a sleep talker by not insisting he wake up fully to nurse, but your sleep addled brain hasn’t had any coffee and the thought slips away as quickly as it came and you’re left with a strange feeling of jealousy. You want to sleep nurse too! Not from his end, no, you like your solid foods too much to go back to a liquid diet. No, you want to be asleep while he’s nursing. Can you do it? Do you have the discipline enough to fall asleep with a baby attached to your nipple?

Yes. Yes you do. 


One thought on “Let Sleeping Baers Lie

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s