Monday Personal Log · Thoughts and Musings

MPL: I’m at a Constant 7-9

Hey, at least I'm not at a 10, right?!

If you ask me how I am feeling these days you are going to get a number from me. On a scale of 1-10, how nauseated am I where 1 is perfectly not and 10 is vomitous. Right now, I just had a bagel and egg sandwich with cream cheese and a couple of swallows of coffee and I’m at an 8.

nauseated to eat or not to eat

Yesterday was Valentine’s. Hubs and I went to Famous Dave’s for supper and then to see Deadpool. Our server was rude and unprofessional, and if Deadpool had been a bad movie my date would have been completely ruined by that jackass. Thank God I laughed my ass off during Deadpool. And thank God that Deadpool was played by Ryan Reynold’s instead of…well, anyone else really.

how I feel about being pregnant deadpool
This. This is accurate. Pregnant Jen is a Bitch

I’ve told my poor hubs that pregnant Jen is a bitch. I mean, I really am. When I was pregnant with Coral, I was in a really bad marriage. I spent most of my pregnancy pissed off and to my utter shame I destroyed my (ex)husband’s guitar and got into a physical altercation with him (in which I used him to destroy some furniture). It was bad. I was a bitch with zero self-control in a marriage run down by infidelity and drug addiction. When I was pregnant with Leif I dumped his father at about week 14 of the pregnancy because I was annoyed with him and I didn’t want to be stuck with him for the rest of time. Thank God he didn’t hold it against me when Leif was born. We are good co-parenters now.

pregnancy hostage situation

So bitch Jen refused to acknowledge the many times my hubs said ‘I love you’ last night because every time he spoke last night he woke me up from the edge of sleep. Because of his insistence on speaking instead of shutting the f– being silent, I didn’t actually get to sleep until after 3. I got up at 7 because regardless of his insomnia or how much sleep I get at night, someone has to school our kids since we have chosen to homeschool. Oh fuck, bitch Jen is being bitter about sleep. I should be sorry. I should delete the last paragraph. I should hide bitch Jen in a closet until she dies the slow death of starvation. But she’s out, and I don’t have the–what’s the opposite of apathy???—fuck it. My apathy levels have sky-rocketed because of sleeplessness.

brainfail

I do love my hubs, though, and it’s easier–well, less difficult– to keep bitch Jen in the closet this time than the previous times. We will see how the first trimester goes. It will be over in a little over 5 weeks. Will my hubs survive? Yes. Will my marriage? Of course because hubs is dedicated to it’s continuance and I’m not going to give him up because I am a bitch on hormones.

preg hormones

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